Hyperprolific showrunner Taylor Sheridan, of Yellowstone fame, loves to resurrect dinosaurs and make them into leading men. Sheridan’s May–December romances are relatively moderate—Yellowstone’s Kevin Costner (age 67), has, at various points in the series, bedded a hottie governor of Montana (played by Wendy Moniz, age 53—sure, sure) and a petulant West Coast vegan (Piper Perabo, 46—hm). In 1923, the new Yellowstone prequel, Harrison Ford (80) is paired with Helen Mirren (77—appropriate!). That’s not bad, all told! Nothing like what goes on in a Woody Allen or Clint Eastwood movie. And yet, there’s something about being asked to swallow all these...